Yippee! It’s Friday! Somebody say yay! Extroverts are getting ready to bamba again as usual. Calls have been placed, hangouts booked.

On the other hand, the introverts are here stuck with their routine, Friday night movies at home, alone. The lucky ones may be going to see boo. Whatever the case may be, at least it’s Friday and they’re taking a break off work.

Here’s a guide for introverts to follow for a great time away from the norm, this weekend:

  1. Make Plans to Attend Amaka’s Party: You don’t talk to a lot of people but didn’t you hear that Amaka from Accounts is going to be having a housewarming party this weekend? That’s definitely better than staying home right? Oh no! You won’t be going; that Amaka is always too full of herself and all the people that will be there should be just like her. You can’t deal please. Just stay home and have your peace.
  2. Call and Hookup with That Guy that has been Blowing up your Phone with Messages: You know that Femi would be so glad to finally have you say a yes to his request to hang out. Now this is getting exciting! The week end won’t be as boring as the rest, after all. Pick up the phone, dial his number, he’ll pick on a first ring; “Oh, How are you Femi? I just wanted to check on you?” “Emem wow! What a surprise. Can we chill somewhere this weekend?” Now this is it, yay! “No. I’m sorry Femi. I’ll be having a headache all through this weekend. Maybe some other time? I just called to say hello”.
  3. Decide and Make Plans to Visit that Fun Place you’ve been having in Mind to: Now this is a great idea! You see, you won’t have to bother about holding conversations with anyone. No need to waste your energy subscribing your social bundle as the last one got exhausted at your cousin’s wedding last December, because you won’t have to talk to anyone. Finally, you’ve got the perfect plan! Sleep and wake ready for the weekend! Ouch! Isn’t that the money you wanted to pay for that course with? No, you can’t waste away your destiny like that. Moreover, you won’t want to stay nodding at the men that will come around your table to say “hi henjel. Awayu dowin?” Rest please. Remember you have that book collection in your library that you’ve been meaning to read. It will be a very productive weekend for you with a lot to save.
  4. Go Jogging: Atleast if you’re not chilling, you should exercise. You need your health in check to keep on with work and life’s stress right? And maybe, just maybe you’ll find a tall, dark, handsome, fit, intelligent, Godfearing, creative guy who won’t be a womanizer or flirt and will hold reasonable conversations with you and won’t be after your banging body and might even be giving you money and free car lifts ear and dear! Go get it girl! Only that there’s harmattan, oh your chest hurts, ah, you can’t get up abeg, it’s weekend and the only time to sleep in till 10am. Why should you choose suffering? Lie down back please.
  5. Visit your Family Living within Town: You should call Aunty Imaobong that has been disturbing you to come and know her place. Seize this opportunity this weekend and get that cleared. From there you can even go see your cousin that gave birth last month together with your Aunty. Wait, isn’t Clara the toddler that ruined your handbag on Christmas day when everyone visited the village? She’s that particular aunty’s daughter. No, no, no! She’s a hoodlum. Imagine staying a whole night and a day in their house? You’ll lose your phone and an eye. Your comfortable apartment is a safer and better choice, please.

I’m sorry, I do not have any guide to help you enjoy your weekend dear introverts. You’ll never lack excuses to stay stuck on that bed with that phone.

Enjoy your weekend the best ways you always do! Now, let me go get ready to bamba and chill with the big boys tonight because TGIF!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.