Mum’s success, popularity came from selfless service, discipline – Alaba Lawson’s son

Akinola, the first child of a former national president of the Nigerian Association of Chambers of Commerce, Industry, Mines, and Agriculture, and Iyalode of Yorubaland, Chief Alaba Lawson, talks to BANKOLE TAIWO about the legacies of the community leader, who died on October 28, 2023, and what she lived for

Your late mother received a lot of commendation from the President and other prominent Nigerians. How did these make you and your siblings feel?

I am Akinola Lawson, the first child of the late Chief Alaba Lawson. I was in the banking industry and worked with an oil firm, but now back home to help with the family’s school business, the Alaba Lawson Group of Schools. We feel so elated and proud that she was an icon and an enigma in her own right, and the condolence messages pouring in across the country and internationally have further revalidated that. We are proud to have her as our mother because she did her best etching her names in the spirit, soul, and body of many across the world. We appreciate everyone for their outpouring of soul-lifting messages. It’s a lesson that we should all play our part very well because one day, we too shall bow out of this side of the world.

 She was renowned for her contribution to nation-building. What fond memories do you have of her while growing up?

 The memories are a potpourri, a mixture of several things. I have memories of mama as a loving mother, a disciplinarian, a mother who brooked no nonsense. If you ask my other brothers, because we are all males, six of us, she was really there for us but when we also remember the part of the discipline, we all laugh. Particularly on weekends, she had this kind of dress that she wore when she wanted to do some cleaning around the house, and all of us had to take cover because we didn’t like standing in her way. She used to go up and down the house to ensure everything was in order and sparkling clean. She was really a mixture of personalities. Yes, she was there for us, always willing to help but she didn’t bend the rules. She was highly principled yet very passionate about lifting other people.

 How did she discipline you and your siblings when you were growing up?

 She disciplined us in many ways. We received slaps, nocks, and sticks. She had a distinctive voice, very loud, and that alone was strong enough to make one adjust their ways. I also remember that when we heard the horn of her car when maybe she had gone out and was coming in, we all jumped up and quickly tidied the house, ensuring that things were in their right positions because nobody wanted to get punished.

 How did she manage to raise six boys?

 Being a disciplinarian, my mother didn’t take nonsense because she instilled discipline and fear of God in us. Right from our early lives, we knew that she was a mother who was not ready to take rubbish, so we were all guided by that in all that we did because we didn’t want to incur her wrath. I also learnt that she had been like that from her youth; she was the type that would not take nonsense from anyone. I also heard that her parents – our grandmother and grandfather – were both disciplinarians. So, it’s a home of disciplinarians and so the six boys had no choice but to be disciplined.

 What would you say contributed to her success in life?

 I must admit that I am just beginning to know my mother now that she is gone because of the many things I hear people say about her. I believe my mother’s success, with the grace of God, came from her ability to connect with people individually. If 100 people were in a group, my mum would connect with each individual; her relationship with them would be on an individual basis and not as a group. My mother could relate with the same set of expatriates now, and the next minute, she would be seen relating with some other old men at the Alake’s palace and she would connect with them individually, not superficially.

You know that she used to be a teacher; there are many of her old pupils that she never forgot their names and faces. She was like a computer; her memory capacity was extraordinary, no matter how big or how tall you became, my mother would spot you. I think her success in life with the help of the Almighty God was rooted in her ability to connect with the people. Now that she is gone, you will see many elderly people coming to say she was a mother to them and I would be looking so surprised, unable to say anything. I think that the ability to connect with individuals was a great gift from God and she used it judiciously.

Why do you think she took her time to reach out and connect with people?

The irony of it all is that all that my mother did was out of sacrifice; it was not because she had fat accounts. No. She reached out to the people out of the little she had. It was all sacrifice and she did it happily as long as the next person was okay, the person next to that person was okay, and the chain continued. She did not do that to please the whole world, because she wouldn’t waste time to tell you off if you misbehaved. Even in school, the little children could feel her presence because she was always relating with them. That’s why she’s being touted as very successful. I have also just learnt that being successful is not about wealth or so much cash, but about being able to live for other people. It is about being able to impact the lives of others positively not because of any ulterior motives or what you wish to get in return. Whatever my mum did while she was alive, she did with her utmost ability and everything in her being. She was always passionate about whatever she wanted to do. Even if you asked my mum to sweep, you would see that touch of excellence, commitment, and dedication in the work.

Is that part of what her children learnt from her?

 Yes. You know I said we are just beginning to know her; her demise is making us much more informed about the enigma that we had as a mother. She was very sincere and passionate about everything that she did while alive. Many people tell me they knew my mum because she did this and that for them, and it cuts across the social strata. You know we need different things in life; she could have been a shoulder to cry on or lean on for some, and she could have been a mentor for others. She was just there for people, adding meaning to their lives.

 She was involved in many activities. How was she able to handle all of them?

 I think I will say that it was a miracle. I don’t know how she did it, but she did it well, and that was why I really didn’t even understand her. Yes, I know that women are naturally gifted to multitask but her’s was on another level. She was able to keep the home intact and still did what she ought to do to make other people happy.

 How did her reputation open doors for you?

 Oh, well on several occasions I came across people who said, ‘Your mother is not like that’, and then they went to any length to help. However, I don’t particularly go out of my way to seek favour in such a way that I had to introduce myself as the child of mama because we were not brought up that way. We have enjoyed a good dose of goodwill around her name, though her prayers had always been for us to receive God’s favour and mercy, and that we have been enjoying.

She was the rallying point for the family; we are really missing that even though she taught us to be strong for one another and be able to hold the fort. We equally miss her place as being there as a mother to us. Certain things can only be done by mothers, we don’t have that luxury anymore but we know we shall be fine by God’s grace. If our mother knew that any of us had any challenge, it was as good as resolved. Despite her very busy schedule, she was quite close to the children

Were there concerns when she had issues with the government?

 Yes. As children, we were all concerned and of course, you will be concerned if your mother has issues. It’s natural but we thank God that the challenge came and disappeared; it’s now history.

 Is it true that your mum had special driving skills when she was younger?

It is true. In fact, I preferred my mother’s driving to that of my father; my father’s driving was very mild and gentle, but my mother’s driving skills were really exceptional and far more interesting. You couldn’t overtake my mother while driving. Someone once told me how he met my mother on the Badagry Expressway some years ago. I think the road had just been opened at that time and my mum was driving a (Peugeot) 504 GL. He said he tried as much as he could, but couldn’t catch up with my mother. I drive like her too. I love it aggressive and interesting. She used to say that driving was her old sport; then, she could go to Lagos three times a day. She was good at driving.

 As someone who was in the vanguard of women’s emancipation and empowerment, was she looking forward to Nigeria having a female President?

 Well, my mother cared so much about women. She could do anything for the women folk. She never wanted women to be treated unjustly. Even outside the country, she was known for her great commitment to women’s issues and development. And every assignment she was given, she always did so satisfactorily and set standards. She always did her things differently, even when she served at the Ogun State Chambers of Commerce, Industries, Mines and Agriculture and her tenure as the first female national president of the National Association of Chambers of Commerce and Industries, Mines and Agriculture as well as when she was the chairman of the Governing Council of Moshood Abiola Polytechnic. She put in her best. This is because when she was given any task, she did it as if it was the only God-given task to her.

The Iyalodes were here (in our home) recently and they spoke of how she carried everyone along without any trouble. I knew she would have been one of the happiest persons to see the first woman emerging as the President of Nigeria because that would be like crowning her efforts to see women going higher and making solid contributions for the betterment of the world at large.

How best can she be immortalised?

 She has already been immortalised by the fact that she impacted the lives of others for good. Aside from that, her academic institution, Alaba Lawson Group of Schools, is another enduring legacy she left behind. The very best way to immortalise her is to ensure that the school continues to wax stronger, producing Nigerians who will further help in taking the country to a higher height. The children are working towards this. I am also using this opportunity to call for people’s support to ensure that this legacy endures from generation to generation.

 What lessons do you wish other Nigerians learned from the life your mother lived?

 I wish we all learn sincerity of purpose, both those being led and the leaders. It’s something that makes a whole lot of difference in our lives and society. It is a pathway to success and this is something we must internalise as Nigerians. This is what sets apart those that we call developed countries. You will find out that whatever people do over there, be it washing toilets, they do it with passion and with sincerity of purpose, no pretence at all. Everything my mother did was to the utmost of her ability. She never had a fat bank account. My mother did not have so much money; all that she did was out of sacrifice and genuine concern for the others. Yes, she had the opportunity to make so much money but she never did.

 It was learnt that she was initially heavily involved in the distribution of drinks. Do you know why she abandoned that to establish schools?

 Yes, she was into the distribution of beer, a very big one but she said that every time she sat down in her shop, she heard babies crying, so she started running the school and after some time, she closed down the (beer) business and faced the school.

 What other business was she engaged in before she started her school?

 My mother was into so many businesses before starting the school. These ranged from selling sacks to selling products like aluminium fittings.

How was your dad able to cope with her energy and strong will to succeed in life?

My father was able to manage my mother effectively because where my mother was hot, my father was cool. So, they complemented each other.

Did she share her story about how she met your father and how they got married?

 No, she did not actually tell me how she met my father, but I know that she got married quite young and gave birth to me at the tender age of 17.

 What was her taste in fashion?

 My mother was always a bit conservative in her dressing. She was also a traditionalist. This accounted more or less for her style. You would have seen that she preferred and wore Aso Oke a lot for ceremonies. This became even more so when she became Iyalode. That means she loved African cultural heritage and preserved it till her last day on earth. She wore a lot of adire too. Most of the adire I wear is from my mother. She also gave a lot away as gifts, especially to people from all parts of the world with whom she came in contact. She was committed to promoting adire, which is our source of pride here in Egba land and Ogun State as a whole.

 What were her favourite food and drinks?

 My Mother liked moin moin a lot. This she usually ate in the morning with pap. She didn’t however eat just any moin moin, being quite the connoisseur as her mother, my maternal grandmother fondly called Iya Olole, made moin moin for a living, which my mother hawked before going to school in those days. So, she was quite selective in eating the delicacy. Overall, however, she was not really adventurous when it came to food. She stuck to what she knew, preferring to eat a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables.

 What type of music did she like?

 Well, my mother liked music from different genres. She liked juju music from Chief Ebenezer Obey-Fabiyi and King Sunny Ade. She also listened to Jimmy Cliff, Abba, the Carpenters, and a few others.

 How did she relax?

 Mama liked listening to music and sleeping. She did not joke with her sleep; this was understandable for someone who was into a lot of activities because the rest she got while sleeping revitalised her and made her get ready for the next set of activities.

 As a disciplinarian, what other things did your mother not like or tolerate?

 As a disciplinarian, she did not tolerate laziness; she believed so much in hard work and diligence, which really contributed to her being successful in life. She hated all forms of indiscipline, lying, or bullying. She didn’t tolerate any of those at all. Mama also hated tardiness or being late. She always said if you needed to get anything done by eight o’clock but did it by a second after that, it was a failure.

 Do you think some men felt intimidated by her boldness and hard work?

 Well, it’s a man’s world, so it’s possible that some men would have been intimidated by my mother’s boldness and hard work. She did everything the hard way.

 What was her last wish before she passed away?

 Mama’s final wish was for us to continue her legacy of nation-building with the school. The school has produced generations of successful young people. She would like this tradition to continue.

 Did she have any unfulfilled dreams?

 I don’t think my mother had any unfulfilled wishes. She lived each day as it came, committing it to God’s hands. Everything she did, she did to the utmost of her abilities according to the words of the famous music composer Ludwig van Beethoven.